Diary of a mom with a chronic illness…

Hey everyone, my name is Helen and I’m a mom of two beautiful children. A 7 year old boy and a soon to be 4 year old girl. Life as a mom is quite rewarding for me. I’m lucky enough to have an amazing supportive husband who decided that my dream of being a stay at home mom was very important and essential for me and our children. All my life I’ve looked after children and I’ve always dreamt of being able to be at home and be present in my children’s lives and thankfully I get to do that.

However, having been a chronic migraine sufferer since the age of 7 it isn’t always an easy ordeal. I love had some really great months of being almost migraine free and then I go through burst of years that I’m lucky to have one day a week without some sort of migraine symptom including the excruciating pain.

Sometimes I don’t even tell people I’m in the middle of a full blown migraine attack because I have so many that it ends up sounding like I’m just complaining to those that don’t “truly” understand what this kind of life is. Many people have strangers tell them how they should “treat and cure” the migraines and I do too, but the sad part I also have family and close friends that do the same. I sometimes step back and think, “they are just trying to help Helen, they don’t know any better” but then I remind myself that these people, family especially, have seen me suffer all my life and should by now know that this isn’t something I can “cure”.

I’ve joined online support groups cause it helps to chat with others that truly understand what living with a non-curable chronic illness is like. Now I’m hoping to share with all of you what my daily life of being a mom and a migraine sufferer is like.

This week was a very difficult week. Monday was one of the worst days I’ve have in a few weeks. I was in so much pain and having the added nausea, dizziness and lack of sleep just made it even worse. I found myself trying to stay conscious all day because I was alone with my kids. Having to cancel plans with an extreme close friend was very hard for me, but because she also suffers from this horrible illness there was no need to even explain. All was needed to be said was “today is a bad day for my head”. I was met with the greatest understanding and what makes her even more special is the constant checking in on me to make sure I was okay. And then there was Hubby who was working far from home and he needs to work in order for us to maintain a roof over our heads and food in the table. I could feel his worry with every phone call to check up on me throughout the day and being unable to help but I made it through the day. I’m blessed that he truly understands what my life is like. That alone is a huge help. And it’s so hard to see that my children at this young age are already learning what having a chronic illness is like.

I’ve had the question asked many times. “How can you make it through the day? I can’t function with a headache, how do you function with a migraine?” My answer is always, “If I don’t get up and get through the day and do the best I can for my children, then who will?” No one will of course.

This is Day 6 of this migraine episode this week. Luckily not everyday was a painful day but I find the ones without pain are just as bad. Saturday, Sunday and Monday was pain and dizziness and nausea. Tuesday and Wednesday was fatigue and lack of apetite. And today, Thursday was back to pain and nausea and fatigue. Hoping tomorrow won’t be another recovery day or the beginning of another attack.

Here’s to a better tomorrow and hopefully a good weekend so I can be a fully involved mom for my children’s final soccer tournaments.

Thanks guys!

Helen

Author: helenasmith2031

I'm a wife to an amazing man and the mom of two great and precious children!

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