My Daily Struggle with a Chronic Illness! It’s an Okay day today…

I’m overwhelmed with the amount of feedback I received from friends. Thank you for understanding me and for offering a hand… means a lot more than you all will ever know.

Today, Friday, is an okay day. I’m up and functioning so can’t complain. I try to accomplish my to do list in bursts of energy. They usually last about 20-30 minutes so I try my hardest to get what I need to get done accomplished. I’m trying to enjoy my last few days at home with both children before they go off to school. As I sit here writing about my day it dawns on me how much of my summer I missed. This weather of course didn’t help but what it did help with was trigger nasty migraines throughout these last months. I had a few great days in the company of AMAZING little children and it’s them that get me up in the morning and make me have the energy to move. Do I wish I had done more? Of course but I also know that the time I did spend with them was precious and wouldn’t trade it for anything.

The plan is to maybe focus more on myself while the kids are in school but I know myself and I know that I won’t be able to just not do something. But it will allow me the time to focus more on things I enjoy such as cooking, baking and Crochet. Imagine that I at the age of 32 taught myself to Crochet. It’s become a very rewarding hobby. On my good days it serves as my therapy. I tend to just focus on what I’m making and it relaxes my brain. It’s just unfortunate that I’m unable to Crochet when I’m in the midst of one of my attacks. But it’s something I look forward to when I’m feeling normal.

There’s a quote I used the other day that says “I see myself as a migraine that gets to be human sometimes”. It’s pretty much true. But do understand that I’m not my illness. My illness doesn’t define who I am. It does knock me on my ass many times but I’m not my illness. I truly just wish there was more research done to help people like me. I’ve learnt that migraines are in the top 20 most debilitating illness according to WHO (World Health Organization). I didn’t realize how bad it is cause I speak from experience that 80% of the time I fake being well as to not burden loved ones or to get through a work day. Being part of online support groups it helps me feel absolutely blessed that my husband is so understanding and supportive that on many occasions he has made it clear to me that having me home makes him extremely happy. He’s seen me struggle for years with going to work and fake being well cause it was easier than trying to explain my pain and illness to others. The common thought everyone has “take some Tylenol so you feel better”. If only that was the case.

I’ve been put on preventative medication for months only to come to the conclusion that I was taking prescription medication for nothing. It wasn’t preventing. Two years ago I finally got to see a neurologist to be told “I assure you there’s nothing wrong with your head” upon asking him to send me for an MRI cause my biggest fear is having a tumour. Needless to say I stopped seeing that neurologist as he told me that he wouldn’t send me for tests and instead put me on medication that is designed for blood pressure but also treats migraines. He told me that there aren’t any meds designed specifically for migraines. Should I have requested a new neurologist? Yes! Did I? Nope. Let me explain why. After suffering for almost 30 years and to have learnt that there’s no cure or any actual effective treatment I felt that it was useless taking up a patient spot from someone that perhaps really needed a neurologist. I began focusing more on natural remedies.

I’ve looked into a daith piercing. I’ve heard success stories but I’ve also learnt that it doesn’t always works. That’s the beauty of this illness. Just because it worked for one person doesn’t mean it will work for another. I have to do a little more research on it and if I do end up going that route I will keep you all updated. In case some don’t know what the daith piercing is I’ve attached a picture.

I promise you all that if I go ahead with this I will keep you all updated. I just have to do research on it and find a good reputable place that will do it properly.

Thanks again for listening!

Helen

Author: helenasmith2031

I'm a wife to an amazing man and the mom of two great and precious children!

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